Love in The Time of COVID-19

Every global event brings with it valuable lessons for humanity. This COVID-19 breakout is also teaching us something. We’ve all been sick before and we all know that the only certainty of birth is death. But what we keep forgetting is that thing that lies between birth and death – LIFE.

We keep taking LIFE for granted. And we keep inflicting unkindness on self and others.COVID-19 is affecting everyone. There is medicine for it and we can use this medicine every moment, every day.

The medicine of Love and Compassion. It’s time to recognise that love and compassion are not only for the rich or the celebrity or one’s own family and friends. Love and compassion are for everyone.

The body and mind feel better when we practise love and compassion. If there is anything that COVID-19 is teaching us right now, it’s that we need to replace fear with love and compassion.

Fear will only breed anxiety, judgement, unkindness, and hate. Love in the time of COVID-19 is our only way. It is the only way that will illuminate us to think better thoughts, speak better words, and perform better deeds.

Those who feel anxious, know that, like everything else in life, this too shall pass. Self-isolation is not about the world ending. It is about you stopping so that the world can heal. If you haven’t yet isolated yourself, now is the time to seriously consider it. And for those who are in self-isolation, use this time to reflect on your life’s priorities – health, relationships, vocation, and spiritual growth. This time, of less doing and more being, is a gift of healing.

The past few days have seen an increase in hostility between married couples due to the isolation period. There is an immense need to pause and reflect on one’s intentions.

Despite the hundreds of religious texts, practices, self-help books and podcasts that teach us ways to demonstrate love, compassion, care, and kindness, marital problems continue to soar. What exactly are we failing to understand about human connection and soulful Companionship?

From my experience as a relationships counsellor, I feel that the main issue is that we use words without practising the essence of those words. For example, we use words like love, kindness, compassion, empathy, and so on, but we don’t really understand how to translate these words into action.

Take the following example: The wife is taking a nap while the husband decides to surprise her and clean the pantry as he is bored during the lockdown. However,  when the wife wakes up she finds that the pantry is not arranged in the same way as before. She tells him off, abuses him. 

Another example is that the husband is spending all his time on the phone instead of helping with household chores. And yet another example is that both the husband and wife are constantly trying to find fault with one another through incessant arguments, bickering and nagging.

These examples show what love doesn’t look like, what compassion doesn’t look like, what respect doesn’t look like and what kindness doesn’t look like.

So, what does love, compassion, kindness and respect look like? How does one translate these words into action?

It is in your tone. It is in your gaze. It is in your touch. It is in your ability to hold space while you listen to your spouse’s words without judgment or reaction. It is in your expression of gratitude, first and foremost, for everything your spouse is doing for you. 

It is in your choice of words – are you accusing or seeking clarification? Are you name-calling? Are you blaming? Are you using respectful words, kind words and speaking them in a kind, respectful tone?

Love, kindness, compassion – these are just empty words unless you translate them into deeds that are in harmony with the essence of these words.

These are challenging times, no doubt. We don’t need to make it any worse with our ugly thoughts, words, and deeds. The world needs us all to pause and heal a disease which is far greater than the COVID-19. It is the disease of unkindness.

Today, just for a few minutes, try to be in stillness and feel your intuitive self…feel why you have been created. With all the excessive doing, take this time to pause and reflect. Breathe. Drink tea. Listen to your favourite music. Sit on your balcony and watch the birds and the trees.

The need of the hour is self-kindness and self-compassion. Do not be consumed by worry. The worry is not worth it. In the bigger plan, the greater good is what matters. And the greater good starts with how you are treating your mind, body and soul right this very moment.

Love, light, peace, joy, wisdom, courage and clarity be with you always. May you be blessed with optimal health and well-being.