Balancing The Unbalanced -Juggling Work And Home Life

April 30, 2018

“There is no such thing as work-life balance. Everything worth fighting for unbalances your life.”
― Alain de Botton

 

The perils of maintaining a work-life balance as a professional can be a challenge, whatever gender you are. Maintaining a healthy work-life balance is brainwashed into us from a very young age.

Parents are duly encouraged to enrol their children in as many extra-curricular activities as possible at school, in the hope of securing the desired university for their child and to maintain their esteem.
And why does this feature so heavily?

It begins with the university but later extends to job applications, forming an essential part of resumes. Employers are increasingly keen on finding the ideal candidate. Perhaps being this well-rounded character has a positive impact on work productivity.

The majority of professional jobs in the UK are not limited to strict 9-5 working hours only, usually requiring more extended hours either within work or from home. Having a ‘life outside life’ outside work stops, work pressures becoming all-consuming and none of this is associated with improved mental well-being.

Over the last few decades, there has been an increase in the proportion of the workforce formed by women. In professional arenas, the age at reaching your career peak often coincides with the time one starts a family.

In the field of medicine, studies show that parenthood brings strain for both female and male doctors, but primarily affects females to a higher degree. Perhaps this is inevitable, as caring responsibilities tend to be taken on by women, causing a higher propensity to stress.

Hence female doctors have been shown to be particularly vulnerable to burnout, primarily due to the imbalance in work-life commitments.
Recent work reforms such as shared paternity and maternity leave, and returning to work at less than full-time hours have improved flexibility within the workplace.

However, as evident with recent scandals in the BBC, gender equality is still not a reality.
Sadly, some of my colleagues feel judged for taking maternity leave or working less than full time, with old-school bosses moaning about its impact on the workforce.

Of those who choose to return to work, what options are available? Working less than full time, with flexible hours and working from home are options available to some.

I have known colleagues to employ nannies, au pairs or similar people to aid with childcare. These arrangements carry a significant expense, and many families rely heavily on nurseries and childminders as a cheaper option.

Even so, these remain costly, with limited benefits available from the government. Hefty fines await if one is even ten minutes late to pick up. You can always note the stress when one of your colleagues is concerned about leaving on time to pick up the kids.

Some are fortunate to have doting grandparents ready to step in. Looking after the children may have a beneficial effect on the grandparents themselves, acting as a cure for ‘retirement boredom.’ However not all parents have an extended family close by, or available at all.
Conversely, not all grandparents will necessarily wish to be ‘on duty’, having worked hard all their lives.

As a mother, one may feel conflicted while trying to juggle both work and family life priorities. Both form essential parts of our identities.

I have even heard colleagues talk about being grouped into the category of ‘workaholic mums’, facing questions such as why they would even consider returning to work, or should they not be relishing motherhood.

We must comprehend that not everyone is suited to spending every minute of every day with the ‘small people’, and that many parents would like to enjoy different and varying challenges, as part of their own development.

Some women may not be in a financial position to be a stay-at-home mum. But long working hours may mean one misses out on crucial quality family time. One can end up feeling guilty either way.

What can we do to make things easier?
Most important, to a woman in this situation, is an understanding partner. Someone who is there to share the workload. I know of some professional couples who have taken advantage of the recent legal changes that now allow shared parental leave.

Secondly, a more flexible workplace would help. If the job role allows, ‘Flexi-time’ can be adopted, thus recognising variable working hours, as opposed to the strict 9-5; and working from home on certain days could help.

Perhaps larger organisations could think about incorporating crèches.

Lastly, there are the qualities of ‘Super-Mum’ – resilience, focus and efficiency — to achieve multi-tasking at its maximum. These skills do not have to be limited to the ‘Super-Mum,’ and we should encourage the development of the‘Super-Dad’ too.

Of note, other European nations such as Germany and Denmark have managed to achieve shorter working hours with increased productivity.

Perhaps we need to examine their working structures in the goal towards improving work-life balance. This aspect can have significant implications for maintaining the mental wellbeing – and hence productivity – of our workforce as a whole.

Life brings its ups and downs, and even if they are not a parent, some people have other caring responsibilities. Recognising individual needs with the goal towards maintaining a work-life balance will help boost work productivity as well as reducing burnout.

As Gloria Steinem says: “Don’t think about making women fit the world — think about making the world fit women.”

 

 

 

 

Kanchana De Abrew

Kanchana De Abrew is a British-born Medical Doctor of Sri Lankan heritage. She is currently specialising in Blood Disorders in the UK. Kanchana is a keen baker and enjoys time outdoors taking walks and running.

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